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Toby Negus

Authenticity

An inauthentic life will always carry sadness that some beauty that we held was never realised.

It is said that the greatest regret of the dying is that they wished that they had been more true to themselves as if f there is a life’s purpose in being who we are, as if who we are is a purpose. As if within ourselves exists the source of our happiness.

The heart knows what the mind cannot see.

Whatever our authenticity is, it comes from the heart of us. We may ‘think’ it through, work it out, but in the end, if we are committed to being true to ourselves, the motive will become a ‘feeling’ thing, some wish to honour the integrity of self, a veracity that comes from the core of our self.

Our authenticity may not always come from what we do, but it will always be in why we do it.

The ‘why’ we do what we do is our defining quality, our inner attitude. It is what makes up our mind and becomes the unspoken aura of who we are.

There can be a thousand people and things in life that influence the ‘why’ of what we do, some nourish the soul and some do not. These half-hidden motives most come from the unconscious mind. Generated from years of memory they often just perpetuate who we were, not necessarily who we wish to be.

The ‘why’ we do what we do is everything. It is The signature of our acts and our abiding resonance. It really is our most precious resource and not to be given away easily. But the world is a busy place, there is so much that demands our attention that we can easily forget our self, and end up walking forlorn paths that are not true to our heart.

When we strive for things we do not have for the sake of what we are not, we abandon our authenticity and become a haunted ghost bemoaning what we are not.

The constant ‘get more’ and ‘don’t miss out;’ of the mass media and the business world bleeds into our subconscious, taking its toll upon our true will. It erodes our sense of self, the perception that we are a unique fraction of life that is beyond compare. But the incessant comparisons to other people and the images in the media, cause our mind becomes distraught and unable to hold our hearts intent. We become, all to easily, a ghost in the belief that we do not have enough time, money or love to be who we are, surrendering our authenticity to get the things the world says we need before we can be happy, before we can say ‘I am enough’

Each time we withhold our truth, our light, our love we abandon who we really are.

So where is the authentic self? How can we know what is truly our will, our truth and not some shallow ego insecurity that is off chasing other people dreams?

The only measurement tool we have to know the truth is our heart. It will, when allowed, give us cherished guidance. But knowing our heart is no easy matter for we carry many emotions that can masquerade as our hearts intent. So a little patience is needed as we learn to remember again our hearts song.

The journey of authenticity is about self-awareness and will, in the end, cause us to make amends to our self, to have forgiveness, for we have not always been a good friend to our self.

The last quality needed, and perhaps the most important is courage, not only the hard courage to create the space for you to be, but also the soft courage to allow the vulnerable self to have its time within you. This step is uncomfortable for we have used the masks of protection for many years and they have given us security in a chaotic world.

Within our vulnerability, there is an indomitable strength.

To be authentic means to go against the tides of persuasion that other people and the world has upon us. Other people may help and inspire but in the end, it is a path that only you can see, only you can tread. You are after all, unique and it is only you that can read your heart’s intention for this life.